bill.

that's my dad's name. and i find it a beautiful thing that God has given me the privilege to fight in prayer for another bill.

i lived in the triad of NC for about 4 years after college. and in that time, God landed me the most incredible job a girl could have ever imagined. at least this girl. i wanted to work in advertising, and the Lord showed me great mercy by letting me work for an agency full of men. and three other women. being outnumbered by men is interesting, to say the least. the conversation is almost always music, bodily functions, sports and any kind of joke at the expense of yours truly. all in good fun.

moving back to wilmington was exactly what i was supposed to do. but it seemed so unfair to have to leave that job. i don't know how to tell you how much i loved it. or maybe it was more the people i loved. because each one is/was so unique. it was there that i saw what it looked like to be a husband, a dad, a spiritual leader... i remember thinking that if i could ever find a man who was the combination of the men i worked with, then he would be perfect.

bill was the class clown. literally. sometimes you wanted to have a whipping stick to pop his knuckles in order to reign him in during a creative meeting. creative doesn't begin to describe him but it was the only title they could stick him under: creative director. when i think of bill, this is what i think of: a musician, a flirt, a word nerd, distracted and focused, strong, a mama's boy, a wealth of useless information, an eyebrow raiser, the best hugger, always finding a common ground to make you feel comfortable, one of the boys, excessive coffee drinker, night owl, a definite kid at heart.

hello dahling.

that's how he greeted me most often. i wish you could hear his voice. it's just...bill.

i remember being so thankful that i could shout "BILL" to a man and not want to take his name in vain. because at the time i was working with him, i hadn't forgiven my dad and held his name in real contempt. but to say this bill's name was easy. he made bill fun. he made bill likeable. he gave bill hope.

but this Bill, he's dying. a few months after i moved, he was officially diagnosed with colon cancer that metasticized. he's fought hard. it's been nearly 5 years. but the doctors say that his time is near.

i'd be lying to you if i felt relief for him. i don't. my spirit groans for him.

something happens when you follow Jesus. your heart becomes stronger because you depend on Him more but your heart also does something you never saw coming. it grieves sin desperately and cries out in huge ways when you see someone losing heart. losing hope. and you get mad. because you see the enemy setting up camp.

so let me tell you this. this girl. bill's daughter. i'm not after the enemy. he's nothing compared to my God. but i'm after this bill. i'm covering him in prayer. i'm asking the Holy Spirit to combat against the enemy until bill's heart softens enough to reach out to the hand that is calling him.

the Holy One. the one we cry out to, Abba Father, is calling bill.

and i COVET your prayers.

this world doesn't need bill. it doesn't need me. but i refuse to give up so that hell gets him. he was created by the living God and i'm asking that you pray with me so that it is He who looks into bill's eyes and lovingly says "welcome home Son."

pray with me. please.

the thing that bill doesn't realize is that he WANTS Jesus. he's just hiding behind the same pride that's denied the Lord for 50+ years.

there is no one like the Lord God Almighty. he is HOLY. HOLY. HOLY.

he is Creator, Perfector, Finisher, Almighty, Everlasting, Ever-present, Healer, Savior, Father. and if the enemy thinks he has anything on that, he ought to stand back and watch the King of Kings take a hold of a heart that he thought he had wrapped in the bag. cause it's on! there's an army of warriors praying for a man named bill.

because we're desperate to send our friend off and finally call him brother.

oh to be present and see him bear hug Jesus.

pray with us, won't you?